The 44-Pound Woman Story

FYI I will NOT be posting any thinspo images in this article, this is Rachael in a healthier place (my assumption)

It’s all over the media. It is trending on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Go Fund Me: Rachael Farrokh, only 37 years old, made a social media plea to help her get treatment for anorexia, and her video went viral.

The media followed soon after, printing article after article with names like, 44 Pound Woman Dying of Anorexia Seeks Desperate Help. The world responded to this viral video and the subsequent news coverage, and Rachael’s Go Fund Me page raised over $120,000.

I am glad that  as a result of this, she is going to get help at Denver ACUTE, an eating disorder treatment center in Denver that helps with medical stabilization. I believe that Rachael Farrokh deserves and does desperately need treatment.

As an honest caveat to what will follow, I do not know extensive details on this story, so I cannot say I know much about this woman’s case. I have not watched her Youtube video plea, nor will I. I will not look at the ultra-thin pictures that pop up on my Facebook.

However, I will say this: the media coverage on this story has highly disturbed me.

In my opinion, the media coverage of Rachael Farrokh’s struggle for treatment does a disservice to all of us in:

1. Inaccurately portraying the reality of most eating disorders

2. Perpetuating the glamorization of anorexia and the exploitation of extremely sick individuals

3. Failing to address the systemic issues at play

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1. I want to take a step back.

Around 20 million women and 10 million men will struggle with an eating disorder in their lives. Currently, there are four major types of eating disorders (per the DSM-V): anorexia, bulimia, binge eating disorder, and otherwise specified feeding or eating disorder (OSFED).

One of the changes to anorexia in the new DSM is the removal of the criteria that people with the disorder must be 15% under their ideal body weight, because that is sometimes not the case. In fact, people with restrictive eating patterns or anorexia can appear of “normal” weights to others. 

Further, the most common eating disorder is NOT anorexia, it is binge eating disorder. Around 1-5% of people have this disorder, and it is associated with recurrent episodes of binge eating. Most people with this disorder, as well as bulimia, are of normal weight.

The point I’m making is this: people with life-threatening, treatment-meriting eating disorders do NOT necessarily have to be underweight to warrant immediate treatment.

You do not have to be 44 pounds to have an eating disorder… or 54, or 104, or 154, or 204.

Eating disorders are life-threatening and should be treated seriously at their earliest signs and symptoms. Purging can be life-threatening at ANY weight. Binge eating disorder and restrictive eating can be life threatening-too. People with eating disorders are usually required to get medical supervision because electrolyte levels, potassium, hormones, etc. must be monitored, thus reaffirming the point that regardless of the diagnosis eating disorders are serious.

This woman is not the norm of people with an eating disorder. Some or most of the time, eating disorders are not visible to the outside eye. At my “sickest” (binging, overexercising, restricting, whatever) people have been completely unable to tell that I was close to breaking down.

I worry about this media coverage. I know the way my brain used to think. I wanted to lose x pounds or get to x weight to feel like I was “worthy” of treatment. For people with eating disorders, this viral story can be triggering and harmful.

2. In a Communication class, I learned this point: “The media is the message.” I want to look at the message that comes through the articles.

In the news articles I saw, I viewed many pictures of Rachael looking severely emaciated and vulnerable, and media articles used words like “desperate” and “shockingly thin.” I’m glad that donations poured in, but why did this story become so popular in the first place?

The media has a strange, glamor-tinted fascination with anorexia. The more severe the story, the more people are interested. In a country full of “obesity epidemic” lingo and sayings like, “You can never be too rich or too thin,” culture is fascinated with people who maybe “went too far” by developing severe anorexia. They receive our sympathy points, and we read the articles. Oh yes, we read those articles about Rachael Farrokh. We saw the pictures, the many pictures.

The pictures that accompanied many of these articles (and the Youtube clip) are nothing short of what Kelsey Osgood coined, eating disorder porn. These images aren’t healthy to anyone. They are triggering to ED sufferers, exploitative of a woman who is clearly dying or is at extreme medical risk, and they falsely portrays what an eating disorder is like in most cases.

Rachael Farrokh is sick. Her body and mind are deprived of nourishment they need to survive. And in the midst of that the media is fascinated with how she looks, and these constant pictures seem exploitative, as if she is being show off in some theater of the grotesque and public pity.

Anorexia and other eating disorders are not sexy or glamorous, as media messages might indicate.

They are severe psychosocial disorders, and those suffering from them need treatment, rather than being exploited by their pictures being blown up on the internet.

3. Even as I write this, I think that deep down, this whole story is a farce to the real story. The real story is this: Stories like this should not be happening in the first place.

Why can’t all people with eating disorders receive affordable eating disorder treatment?

Why does there need to be a Go Fund Me page not only for Rachael but for anyone with an eating disorder?

Well, that’s an easy answer: because the American health care system is not conducive to helping people get eating disorder treatment. 

ED sufferers have a high mortality and relapse rate, and insurance companies (in my experience historically) do not like to cover full, comprehensive treatment for treating the disorder.

A few years ago, I was at a point in my life in which I was looking at doing IOP (intensive outpatient) treatment. My insurance company denied my claim for services, even though I was out of control and in desperate need for help. I flat-out asked this question: “If I weighed 5 pounds less, would you authorize me to go to treatment?” Whoever I was talking to at the ever wonderful Blue Cross didn’t directly answer that question but did say this, “You might have a better case.”

You might have a better case.

As if I have to plead the right to receive eating disorder services, that my insurance company is all but telling me: Lose 5 pounds and you can get the help that you need.

How fucked up is that.

As I’ve said in this blog post several times, eating disorders are severe, and weight is often not a good indicator of how much someone needs or “deserves” treatment.

Everyone deserves treatment. NO ONE deserves to go through the living hell of an eating disorder. While we heard about Rachael’s extreme story in the news, there are countless people who are unable to afford treatment and are dying as a result.

The American health care system needs to understand ALL eating disorders for what they are and be able to offer treatment for those who need it.

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In sum, the media has done a disservice to others with eating disorders. The articles full of glamour-tinted images of someone dying of anorexia do not accurately describe the experience of most people with eating disorders. In addition, no articles I’ve read mention the systemic injustices having to do with lack of insurance coverage for eating disorder treatment.

I have nothing against Rachael Farrokh. I hope she recovers fully and goes on to live a full, meaningful life. But the media, society, and we as individuals need to think critically about this story and how we understand anorexia and eating disorders in general.

Bikini Season, Body Shaming, and Other Stupidities

Bikini season is coming!

We know what that means… Lots of bikini/ fitness/ diet Pinterest boards leaving people feeling horrible about themselves. Article titles like, “How to get ‘bikini ready”. Or, articles about kale smoothies and how good they taste and while you’re at it,you should exercise like 18,000 calories a day. Pictures of “best/ worst” celeb bikini bodies. It’s already begun with “shocking” pictures of Tara Reid in a bikini and talk show hosts telling Kelly Clarkson she “could stay off the deep dish pizza” after she… gained weight (WHAT!!!!) after having a baby (um, you’re supposed to lose that weight in 2 weeks, maybe less, everyone knows that *heavy sarcasm*).

I don’t know what is more sad: 1) That a bunch of tabloid dipshits judge and mock people’s bodies, how much they eat, and their weight struggles/ triumphs/ how they’re “letting themselves go,” or 2) That somehow these magazines are selling! People are reading articles by said dipshits.

I just have to ask: What is this world?

What kind of weird society do we live in that deems terms like “fat,” “dessert,” “seconds,” and “full” shameful? What is so disgusting about women’s bodies? Side note: my focus for this post will be about body shaming women because I am one and have more to say on the topic, but men are also victims of body shaming.

All of the mean twitter posts… the cyber bullying… the incessant fat shaming… WHY? The stigmatizing body shaming comments casually zinged about, they hurt. We may not acknowledge that body shaming comments hurt inside, but they do.

Body shaming hurts.

There is endless interpersonal and internalized shame about what we look like– that number on the scale what we eat what we don’t.

Culture tells us appearance defines our worth.

People are ashamed of their own bodies, and then collectively, we shame the body of others. With all this body shaming going around, it is no wonder that the diet industry is so prominent. And here’s where things get more disturbing. In 2014, the U.S. diet industry raked in $60.5 billion. More disturbing yet: that astronomical number is a DECLINE from the year before.

This video is a good visual of how much $1 billion really is. So take that video’s visual and try to wrap your mind around $60.5 billion. This is, by any standard, a lot of money. How many social ills that much money could solve in the world? Water sanitation, poverty, racial, sexual, policy to promote gender equality, and so much more! Maybe we could even put a dent in the United States’ massive debt.

Let’s just sit here for a moment and realize how fucked up this all us.

People are spending more money than the GDP of many countries on diets that become popular and unpopular as fast as hashtags or the latest in social media… Atkins is old school (the N’Sync of diets), but kale is in (the Taylor Swift of food). People are going Paleo, organic, and gluten free. Egg white omelettes are the new black. Diet pills remain comparable to the quirky and questionable relative at many family gatherings. Constantly changing options for people who are essentially wasting their money considering that DIETS DON’T WORK!!

Body insecurity is a given in today’s culture. Between 40 and 60% of young girls ages 6-12 are already expressing concern about their weight or are worried about being fat. The body-shame cycle starts so young. The same girls memorizing Let It Go and wearing Elsa costumes around the house might be considering going on their first diet. Maybe they already have.

In our culture, we are not at peace with our bodies, and how can we be with all this propaganda and equating body size and looks to worthiness? We think, maybe that next fad diet will make us enough. Maybe, then, we can feel okay and good about ourselves. Maybe, then, we’ll be worthy.

I follow an Instagram page called “Bye Felipe” which was created to call “out dudes who turn hostile when rejected or ignored.” The site usually focuses on people who are interacting on dating web sites. You can see for yourself the number of fat-shaming comments doled out to girls on this page. It is horrifying to open up my Instagram and seeing how guys degrade women by playing on body insecurities and playing the “fat” card.

These comments hurt, and they are dangerous.

So here is my message, and I wish I could put this in size 200 font:

LET’S PUT DOWN THE SWORDS.

Let’s stop shaming ourselves and others about the way they look.

Let’s treat our bodies with acceptance and compassion.

Let’s humanize each other’s bodies. Let’s humanize our own bodies.

Do we have body flaws and faults? Do some people need to gain or lose weight? A resounding yes. But can that be okay? Are we still worthy? An equal and resounding yes. It is possible to take care of our body struggles with a posture of love and self-care.

When people talk about how so-and-so is too thin/ skinny/ fat; what’s with her butt/ boobs/ nose/ ears/ mouth/ teeth/ hair, they don’t know who they’re affecting. Little girls (AND little boys) see the disgusting way people are body-shamed, and we’re breeding new generations of body-shamers.

An app exists in which you can “fit the fat girl crown”, and there was an app (thankfully it was TAKEN DOWN) that was designed to “rescue the anorexic girl.” All this when some reports suggest that incidences of eating disorders may be on the rise.

Disgusting, disgusting, disgusting.

You don’t know what the person across the street or next to you or in the cubicle over from you is dealing with, body-wise or life-wise. Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle. Often you know nothing about it, and it is better to be KIND and COMPASSIONATE, rather than shaming and potentially triggering. This spring marks the 14th year of my eating disorder, and frankly, I think people have to mind their own fucking business. I realize this does not sound kind, but one negative comment can set off a slip or relapse or a passive-aggressive text to my therapist about how much I hate her guts. NO ONE wants to hear a passive aggressive, “Do you really need that slice of cake?”, or, “Wow you look huge in that picture!” And especially not someone who has struggled with an eating disorder.

PUT DOWN THE SWORD.

So in conjunction with this blog post’s title, I’m going to tell you a secret about bikini season. Here is how to have a bikini body:

People are at war with their own bodies and the bodies of others. It is a war that no one will win, but there will be many casualties.

So, in sum: be kind, compassionate, and please: